Kinship Care Story: New Hampshire Grandparents Helped by Step Up Parents Share Their Struggle
New Hampshire grandparents who stepped in to raise two of their grandchildren due to their own child's struggle with substance use disorder recently turned to Step Up Parents for support. We awarded the grandparents $500 to help cover the cost of summer camp at the YMCA of Londonderry. They wrote to us to share their gratitude and describe the challenges they have faced raising kids a second time later in life.
“You never imagine that you will be raising children again after everyone moves out,” they wrote. “The unfortunate circumstance that surrounds a lot of parents (grandparents) is some sort of substance abuse, be it alcohol, drugs, or even mental issues.”
Like many kinship caregivers, they initially experienced feelings of guilt and self-doubt. “The first emotion is shame. What did I do wrong? Of course, we all know that it’s the choices they make, but we don’t feel that way.”
Beyond the emotional toll, there are physical challenges as well. The couple described the difficulty of keeping up with energetic children at their stage of life. “It’s difficult to do all the same things you did with your own kids... I don’t have the energy, and my patience is very thin. Loud noises bother us, and all the fun stuff the kids want to do—they should be able to do.”
Support networks have been essential for the family, and they expressed deep gratitude not only to Step Up Parents and organizations such as the NH Foster & Adoptive Parent Association, ServiceLink, and the Upper Room’s Kinship Navigator Program. “Being able to commiserate with others in the same circumstance is very consoling, and we bounce challenges off each other,” they wrote.
Raising their grandchildren has come with sacrifices, including missing time with other family members. One of their adult children, who lives out of state, struggles with the reality that his parents are unable to visit as often because of their commitment to the two children they are raising.
“Our entire life was put on hold and reconstructed. Raising two children is challenging, but the rewards of seeing their successes are worth it all.”
This summer, the children will attend both overnight and day camp thanks in part to the financial assistance they received. “I am very grateful for the money you are able to assist us with. Thank you to all of the people that give and to the workers. You are so appreciated.”
Step Up Parents continues supporting kinship caregivers who step up to prevent children from entering the foster care system. To contribute to our mission, please consider donating at www.stepupparents.org/donate.